An Update - In List Form

1) My second nephew entered the world on February 10! Go to my sister's blog to see some pictures. He is really beautiful. He doesn't have that typical new baby look... you know, the kind where you say, "Oh, how cute," but really mean, "Wow, I hope he improves with time..." Unfortunately, I probably won't get to meet little Thomas for a while, because I'm in Massachusetts and my sister is in California. This is sad, and if I were rich I would visit my family more often.

2) Pimples?! PIMPLES?! What am I, seventeen years old? It's this horrible weather. It's so dry I get a nasty shock anytime I touch anything. If I brush against FavoriteBoy's stereo equipment, it zaps me and crackles loudly. It's so dry I have to put tons of lotion on at least once a day. And I still itch all over. And the result of the dry skin/excessive lotion combination is... I look like a teenager. Wasn't that supposed to be over at least five years ago?

3) My parents aren't doing well. Mom went back to the hospital last Wednesday. She got really sick while at home, and couldn't keep her meds down eventually... meds that helped control anxiety, depression, pain, etc. Poor Mom. Poor everyone at home, really. When she went back to the hospital, the doctors thought they had discovered another bleed in her brain. It turned out that everything was okay, but... scary time period. I didn't know about it until after we knew things were all clear, but Dad did, of course. He's doing better now than he was for a while, but he's pretty discouraged. Mom's sort of relapsed - she's not moving much, and she's getting more confused again. And I hate to sound childish, but I can't help thinking, "It's just not fair." Hasn't she already had all she can deal with? Haven't we all?

I really miss my Mom. I know that probably sounds morbid. She's not really gone, after all. But I used to call several times a week and we'd just talk. I'd ask her how to make a certain recipe I liked, or tell her what I'd made or done or organized recently. She kept me up-to-date on news in her homeschool co-op and in our community, and was a great listener about my life and thoughts. Now, every day I look at a picture of my parents up on my bookshelf and think how strange it is that things can change so quickly. I can't quite wrap my mind around it, this happening to my Mom.

Three and a half months ago, a good day was good lessons for my students, a good practice session on my violin, a good day at co-op for Mom, a good day at work for Dad, an evening spent with FavoriteBoy, a good chat with Cara or Melissa or Emily. Now a good day is Mom moving her arm a little further than yesterday, holding herself up in a chair a few minutes longer than last time, remembering what happened earlier in the day. A good day is Dad staying in reasonably good spirits and me not wanting to cry every time I think about my parents.

I don't understand God.