Reeims, Vol. 5 {the four-year-old edition}

Marie turned four last month, and a few days after her birthday I lamented to a friend, mostly joking, "For a year I've been telling myself to just hang in there through the threes, to just wait until she turns four and it'll get easier, but here she is four and it's still the same!"  Surprisingly, it would appear that these maturations don't happen overnight, not even when birthdays are involved.

The thing about Ree, at the end of the day, is that she just defies any kind of labels or boxes.  She's equal parts sugar and spice, with some snips and snails thrown in for good measure.  Any time I think I have her figured out, she throws me a new curve ball and I'm scratching my head in wonderment again.  She's equally likely to creep quietly up to my bed in the morning and snuggle silently and sweetly beside me, or to come throw a wooden car at Molly's sleeping head at 5 am and then, when I send her down to her room and ask her to wait quietly for me, to scream unrelentingly, "I'M HUNGRY I'M HUNGRY I'M HUNGRY....!" until the entire household is awake.  {HYPOTHETICAL OF COURSE}

She's equally likely to be fiercely independent and refuse all forms of maternal or paternal aid, or to have a meltdown at the prospect of putting her own underwear on.

She can often be disdainfully dismissive of Daddy, and entirely preferential of Mama... and then she may run circles around the house for ten minutes when Daddy leaves for work, bemoaning the fact that he can't take her with him.

And sometimes she even has a fit because she needs to go potty but she doesn't want to.

Is this what age four is like, and I've forgotten how it was for Nell?  Or perhaps this is all peculiar to this specific child of mine?  In any case, there is a lot of screaming but also a lot of laughter, a lot of nonsense singing, and a lot of sweetness these days.

I think she could have a great future as a social justice warrior, because she feels things very strongly and advocates for human rights ceaselessly.  Well, actually so far she only advocates for her own rights, but ... we're working on it.  Often any corrections or admonitions on my part are met with, "That's not OK for you to talk to me like that!"  Or, "Hey! You're being rude to me!"  Or even the somewhat precocious, "Hey, be kind to me, because I'm only a small child!"  She's certainly doing her part to keep me at my best as a parent.

Several times a day, Ree will come to me wailing like a siren, and declare, "Nell hit me and kicked me and pounded me!"  Always all three in rapid succession like that!  And always a rather one-sided story I'm being told!  It's all I can do to keep a straight face every time, to tell the truth.  Something about the "pounded me" bit cracks me up every time!

Lest you think Nell is the only guilty party in these inevitable sibling altercations, I can attest that a common scenario around here involves some form of verbal provocation, examples of which include: 

"I love Mama and Daddy and Molly and everyone.  But not Nell."

"Nell is bad."

"Nell is not very fancy."

And other such subtle commentary.

Each of these types of comments {sometimes even set to song} is immediately followed by a sweet smile and, "Oh, I'm sorry Nell!  I'm sorry!  It was an accident!  I'm so sorry!"  Or sometimes, in an attempt to course-correct, "Nell is a fairy!  Nell is a princess!"

I genuinely think we will all laugh about these days someday, but in the meantime, if you see me and my hair is turning grey and I've developed a nervous twitch, you'll know why.  Ohhhhh very clever second child of mine.  Perhaps soon you can find a source of power outside of tormenting your extremely sensitive older sister?

{I'm only recording these exchanges here after a lot of thought -- will this someday reflect poorly on Ree?  Or are these the typical silly sibling clashes that we'll all have a good laugh about someday?  We're pretty sure it's the latter.}

She's tough as nails but also feels things strongly, like one morning recently when in a period of about a half hour she had been quite sad about:

not wanting to grow up
wanting to be a baby forever
wanting to keep her 'woof-woof cup' {dog shaped cup from IKEA} forever
wanting to have a hundred babies in our family
wanting Molly never to grow up
the devastating fact that Nathan had left to go to an appointment
wanting to marry Daddy someday
wanting to sit beside Mama at meals
wanting all her dresses to be twirlier

... and all of this culminated in Nell being sad too because she loves Marie so much and is so happy she'll have a sister forever.

{Sometimes I cannot even imagine what this household will be like when these girls become teenagers!  Let the good times roll!}

She calls swimsuits "swimswoots," a mustache a "mushtash," and pistachios "spasmashios."

* * *

I recently overheard her encouraging our robot vacuum, "Cinderella, you can do it!"

* * *

"Mom, what do sunflower seeds come from?  The sun?  Or seeds?  Which one?"

* * *

"When I was a little girl I used to pee and poop out of my foot."

* * *

"Princesses like yogurt."

* * *

When she was in the bathroom a little bit too long and things were a little bit too quiet, I dashed upstairs to check on her only to see her quickly shut the bathroom cabinet and say, innocently, "I was just checking on all your flosses and lotions and things."

"But where can Nell and I go to get married to our boys someday when we want to get married?"

* * *

Hiccupping: "I hicc-ed up."

* * *

{pointing to her side}: "I have a headache right here."

* * *

"Sometimes God laughs."

* * *

"Daddy doesn't like fruits or vegetables.  Sometimes boys just like chocolate."

* * *

"Elephants don't paint their nails."

* * *

Thoughtfully: "If a bear or a snake was eating you, you could just ask your Mom or Dad for help."

* * *

Walking into the music room one afternoon while I was teaching lessons, she turned a small end table  over on its side, and announced with pleasure, "It's an idiosyncrasy!"

Sampling a sip of a milkshake we were all sharing: "This is yummy!  I want all of the milkshakes!  So many milkshakes!!"  {I pretty much feel the same way, let's be honest}

* * *

Me: "What do you want for your special birthday dinner?"
Ree: "Carrots, and maybe some wine."

* * *

Me: "Ree, I need you to wash your hands now before dinner."
Ree: "Don't be mean to me! You're not in charge, only God is!"

* * *

Ree (talking about some friends) "... one of the sister boys."
Me: "That's called a brother."
Ree: "Oh yeah.  A brother."

* * *

Feeling indignant: "Molly's smiling at me and it's not very polite because I'm sick today so she shouldn't be smiling."

* * *

Talking to her baby doll: "You are beautiful.  But you ate too much food last night and now you are all plumped up and your belly button might fall out."

* * *

"Hey Mama, you are super huge and big."   {#blessed as always by her uplifting comments!}

* * *

As I took a completely plain, not-yet-decorated brown grapevine wreath out of my car, Ree noticed it and exclaimed, "Is that for us?? Is that for our door??  It's SUPER CUTE."

 When she was sick with a stomach bug recently, she started whispering miserably, "Hoop!  Hoop!"  I asked her what she meant, and she replied, "'Hoop' just means you're not feeling very good and you might need a snuggle."

* * *

"Mama, I remember when you broke your foot once.  But now you have a new one so I guess it's OK!"

* * *

Watching me do a workout DVD: "Those ladies are not wearing very many clothes.  I don't want to see their icky icky bodies!  I only want to see my Mama!"

And later during the same workout: "The boys are always naked.  They aren't wearing shirts so they're naked.  I'm glad OUR Daddy is not always naked."

And yet another workout commentary: "I think Daddy needs to do a workout.  Because he needs to be stronger."

* * *

Nell got a very fun set of walkie-talkies for her birthday from her Grammy and Grandpa, and after they had been being used with great pleasure for at least a week, it became apparent that there was some confusion over the name, brought about by neither sister being quite fully able to say the letter "R" correctly. 

Ree: "Mama they're really called rrrrrockie-talkies, right?  And Nell just says walkie-talkies?"

Me {cracking up}: "No, they are really called walkie-talkies!"

Ree: "Mama, are you trying to say rrrrrrockie-talkies?"

Watching the winter Olympics: "Mom, I really want to learn to ice skate.  TODAY.  RIGHT NOW."
Five seconds later: "WHY isn't ANYBODY in my family letting me skate?!"
{I know... we are so unsupportive of our children's dreams.}

* * *

Me: "Ree, we need to comb your hair before we go - you look like a wreck!"

Ree {offended}: "I don't look like a wreck, I look like a beautiful star."

* * *

At church one day during Holy Week, clearly focused on all the right things: "Those two girls have sparkly shoes and I don't have sparkly shoes and I'm sad because I don't want anyone to be fancier than me!"

* * *

"I'm drawing a picture of me as a ballerina dancing on a stage and peeing in a pull-up." {she hasn't worn pull-ups in ages, but clearly the dream lives on}

* * *

Drawing a family portrait: "Daddy doesn't need to look fancy in my picture because he isn't fancy because he doesn't have any dresses."

* * *

In the bathtub: "There's not going to be room for Nell in here because I'm doing so much important work.  I'm practicing pointing my toes so I'll be ready to be a ballerina on toe shoes."

* * *

Me: "Hey, Marie?"
Ree: "No!  Call me 'Princess of the Twirl!'"
Me: "Ok.  Hey, Princess of the Twirl?"
Ree: "YES!!!"

We love you, Princess of the Twirl.

xoxo,
Mama